Procrastination Opportunist

This is for all those who were driven insane by the pictures below and the lack of explanation involved. No, I'm not going to explain them; I'm going to throw in my Coke poem for the enjoyment of the hoi polloi who read my blog. Not that I'd consider any of the fine citizens who read my blog 'hoi polloi'...

I Really, Really, Really, Really, Really, Really, Really, Really, Really, Really, Really, Really, Really, Really, Really, Really, Really Like Coke.

Obey your thirst ™ Sprite, but a greater delight
Will not leave your temperament blue
Half a cup in the morning picks me up when I’m yawning
And the rest of my family too.

Always ™ the liquid is voted ubiquitous
As the pure essence of bliss
What I’m wanting to know is how they make it glow
Gotta get to the bottom of this.

Containing unseen, ‘neath a caramel sheen
Caffeine is laced heavily ‘pon it
Half a ml of this factor would power a tractor
Even one with zilch under the bonnet.

My Coke, good folk, is my tinny, my toke
My hookah I feel I must share
‘Twixt the cup and the lip of my sweet candy flip
‘Ticipation’s what hangs in the air.

Socrates once wrote that acting the goat
Is the E-Pit-O-Me of a joke
He was a great thinker, also a great drinker
What is Phil-Os-O-Phy without Coke?

The ultimate brain drink, the one keep-me-sane drink
My tongue knows no greater sensation
A kick to the mental (not subtle or gentle)
Cognition ignition stimulation.

Want to get wired, or feel inspired?
Your choice is the measure you take
You tire? Acquire the fire the buyer
Of Coke gets, sleepers awake!

My first sip, I quip, was like the crack of a whip
The first time I really awoke
Forget the Prozacs™, kick back and relax
At your elbow a cool glass of Coke.

Do you feel blue inside? Contemplate suicide?
Are endorphins allergic to you?
Hear now my voice, you have but one choice,
Only costing a dollar or two.

For a can or a bottle, go from nil to full throttle,
Energize your tired body right through.
Even swallow the dregs, for you have hollow legs,
Coke is good for filling out too.

With Coke in proximity, nothing can limit me
So they call me Mr Fahrenheit
No one can think quicker or speak any slicker
In the heat of my Coke-fuelled insight

But no-one could force me ever to endorse ‘V’
Unless they were hulking and green.
Pepsi? Don’t kid me, it’s all too plain to see
It spells ‘septic’ with a little more p in!

A bottle in front of me, or a frontal lobotomy?
Where Coke’s concerned it’s no game.
So quit your musing, for thinking of choosing
Any other drink would feel the same.

Enjoy™ Coca-Cola, the drink, call it ‘solar’
Why? Cause it shines from the shelf.
In fact, buy it quickly, for I’m getting a sickly
Feeling I’ll steal it myself.



So that's it... and it's all true. I feel like I've been very productive this evening, even if the truth has been more like reruns of every product of my life shown end on end. For the benefit of you, my dear readers :)